


with these faraway traces, don't forget about me

by eunhaa



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Angst, Happy Ending, M/M, Messy, Open to Interpretation, lapslock, really weird but ok me
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-25
Updated: 2018-02-25
Packaged: 2019-03-23 22:00:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 931
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13797204
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eunhaa/pseuds/eunhaa
Summary: it seems he’s never tired of waiting for baekhyun.





	with these faraway traces, don't forget about me

**Author's Note:**

> i finished this in a day, because for some reason nothing about this would leave my thoughts alone. so, i hope u like it!!

baekhyun’s delicate fingers find their way into the pocket of sehun’s coat. sehun halts and waits, keeps waiting, because that’s what he’s always been doing. that’s what he’s good at. waiting, especially for baekhyun.

he wants to hear something, anything. _i’ll stay._ he wants deliverance, searches for a stillness in his mind. _because i love you._  but, as always, baekhyun lets go of sehun. he says nothing and disappears along with the wind. sehun waits for him to be gone, waits to hear silence in its entirety.

it seems he’s never tired of waiting for baekhyun.

 

sehun doesn’t remember what it felt like to stay in one place for more than a night or two. he’s been searching for a place to stay for an eternity, but everything feels short of home. of _him_.

he’s been searching for something that he knows he’ll never reach. because he knows his home, but somehow his home is always a step ahead of him, is always running away from him.

 he never stays in a place for too long, because he knows. he _knows_. nothing could become even close to the feeling of watching the sunrise through baekhyun’s eyes.

 

when they meet again, sehun has his hands under baekhyun’s shirt, his skin burning against sehun’s fingertips. the moonlight casts a shadow over them, sehun engulfed in darkness while baekhyun is shining. he’s always shining, at least for sehun.

they are in seoul. like they met in seoul for the first time, when sehun was a boy just short of eighteen years old, his body awkward and a mess of limbs. baekhyun had been as small as he is now, but his smile had been brighter than ever. full of promises of tomorrow, full of hope, a force for the stars to battle with.

sehun misses them, then. the younger versions of them, and then he misses him. his fingers slip away from baekhyun’s skin in the quiet of the night and this time it’s him who leaves first.

sehun keeps missing him.

 

he visits jongin in seoul before he has to catch a flight to wherever, he doesn’t know where himself. jongin pours him coffee, sits with him for an hour, talks to fill the silence in between and taps his cheek with an encouraging smile. _you’ll do well. i’ll miss you._

sehun smiles back at him and drops an _i’ll see you_ before closing the door behind him. sehun knows he’ll see jongin again. because jongin is predictable, jongin stays and jongin waits for him, too.

but, most of all, jongin _stays_.

 

sometimes sehun likes to reminisce the way baekhyun glowed in the mornings. his warm toned hair catching light, shining bright against the white sheets. his summer smile and auburn eyes.

sehun wants to remember these.

he holds mornings closer to his heart now. listens to the whisper of the birds, catches the sun rays through whatever window he’s looking through and wishes for a new dawn. they aren’t to be taken for granted, he knows now.

the cold floor under his feet reminds him of the present, where he ought to stay. sehun crawls back into the blankets, lets himself be warmed with the thoughts of a better yesterday and meets baekhyun again when he closes his eyes.

 

sehun knows it’s been years since it all started. it’s easier to forget now, when he has no one to remind him. he hasn’t seen jongin in months, the days passing by in frenzy. he hasn’t seen baekhyun anywhere but in his dreams for what feels like an eternity.

sometimes sehun forgets why he’s running. forgets and forgives. it could be better now, for all he knows. he hasn’t opened any messages from jongin in days. but he keeps running, for maybe he wishes to be found.

 

sehun is tired. his cheeks hollow and his eyes a darker shade of dullness. sehun has been naive for most of his life, always taking things for granted. he thinks maybe it’s past time he learned, but he doesn’t.

searching and finding baekhyun had always been a certainty. no matter how long they’d be apart, no matter how far away from each other they’d been, sehun has been sure that he’d always meet him.

he hasn’t now. for 365 days, he hasn’t had a taste of his home, hasn’t been blinded by an aura much brighter than his. he wonders if this is how it ends.

he hopes it does. he’s tired.

 

sehun returns to jongin’s arms with a finality in his embrace. _i can’t do it anymore_ . he sobs into his friend’s skin, his words clinging onto the air. _i’m sorry._ sehun wants to apologize to many, to baekhyun most of all. and he is. sorry.

jongin holds him, whispers him sweet nothings and sehun waits to stumble into oblivion. but he doesn’t. jongin lets go of sehun. smiles. there’s something giddy, something beautifully right in the smile he presents for sehun and sehun looks away.

and he. _baekhyun._

he wonders if heaven looks like this. looks like jongin’s bookstore with dusty edges and a warm smell. if it feels the same way he feels, when he sees baekhyun standing in front of him.

_“i’ve been waiting for you,”_ is all baekhyun says.

 his baekhyun.  _waiting for him._ sehun doesn’t see jongin anymore, only baekhyun. hasn’t seen anything else since the beginning anyway.

_“it seems i never grow tired of waiting for you,”_ baekhyun says, and his smile reaches his eyes.

 

and if sehun stops running now, well, he’s been tired for a long time.


End file.
